For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize