I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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