we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
