He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
