I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
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