I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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