none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Randomize
