Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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