found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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