:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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