Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
