is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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