I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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