Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Fuck appropriateness.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
