Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Randomize
