you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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