so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
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