The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
