People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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