i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Randomize
