does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Randomize
