But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
