brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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