I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
