You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
