we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize