Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize