Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
