nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
