It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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