I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize