I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
