when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
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