I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I just gift wrapped bread.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You're a waste of cheezeits
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
