I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize