recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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