someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Everyone says I win the strip club
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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