I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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