Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
