he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
