My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
