Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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