I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
