Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
