yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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