Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize