Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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