Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
