wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
