Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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