i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
