I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
